I have a better understanding of the human psyche than most of my species but even I don’t understand this human fascination with documentation. Mallory claims that’s because goldfish learn to recognize the other fish in their tank pretty quickly so we don’t constantly have to prove who we are; although I really do think the dear girl is just making excuses for humans. Be that as it may, we’re just documenting away here, well actually I’m directing since paper and water don’t really mix well. And do we have documentation!
So, let me catch you up on what has been going on around here in the great house adventure. I’ve been doing some detecting on getting mortgages and it looks like I’ve finally got an ally in the “let’s be logical and know what we’re doing” battle. Holy mackerel, for an intelligent human Mallory just wasn’t doing well plotting her course. Get this, new house in the near future and she wanted to buy a new car. One slip in internet surfing, just one, she ends up on a new car website and my girl gets reeled in hook, line and sinker. (I did write an email to the auto company complimenting them on their marketing, but that’s really not the point.)
It was pretty clear that we had to deep dive into finding someone to help who had a good grasp of all of this before we got into hot water. (Which is really not good for me.) We hadn’t moved on from the friend-of-the-friend-of-the-friend-knows-something-about-mortgages stage that we were in a couple of weeks ago.
So, I’ve rested and boy did I need it. Last week it wasn’t easy getting Mallory to tame her emotions and think about this whole house thing logically. Logic is what humans are supposed to be good at, right?
I knew something else was fishy on Tuesday when she walked into the house; she was just so excited, and really, who gets excited about going through their financial records? She had been over at Adam’s so he could help her organize her business and personal financials; turns out that Adam mentioned he might want to buy the house with her. Well, I don’t have to tell you, Mallory was thrilled. (Humans, what are you going to do?) Really bad idea. I like Adam, but that’s swimming in troubled waters. I knew what I had to do was nudge her away from that idea without damaging her perception of their relationship. Water under the bridge now but let me tell you, figuring out how to do that cost me some sleepless circles.
Talk about misconceptions – humans think a goldfish’s life is dull? Not around here. Mallory dove into the house buying business with her usual focus. (It’s closer to obsession but I love her so we’ll leave it at focus.) Unfortunately, my human just doesn’t know the right questions to ask about all of this so she’s kind of going around in circles – which is my thing not hers. Not that I’m certain of the right questions either, my living quarters are portable, but I do know that we don’t know our options (especially when it comes down to how we choose a lender).
Looks like we’re moving – again. Just this morning my human said: “Hey Pearly, think it’s time we owned our own place, don’t you? “ Not that I mind, it’s getting pretty boring looking at these apartment walls and that roommate definitely needs an upgrade. I’d been expecting this; she’s been surfing real estate sites on the Net so I’ve been boning up on the whole human house – buying routine anyway. (Although I love my human, let’s face it, she sometimes doesn’t do her research as well as she could.) That’s one of the advantages of being a Goldfish, you have a lot of time to think while you swim those circles.
If you don’t have anything to say; don’t say anything!
This might seem like weird advice. It stems back to the old saying my mother used to say all the time “If you can’t say something nice; don’t say anything at all.”